2.7.15

4 Strategies for Dealing with Toxic People


 1.Talk to other people.
I’ve found that when I’m upset about someone else's actions or behaviours, I often don’t want to admit it to other people, but then when I talk to someone else about it, I inevitably feel better. So take the plunge and talk to someone. Share your feelings, ask for them to listen, maybe even give advice. The advice doesn’t matter so much as the connection and listening. 

 2. Talk to the toxic person. 
Once you start to feel more calm towards the other person, talk to them. Yes, they might not act in a calm and peaceful way towards you, but you can be the better person. You can try and see that they’re suffering in some way, and are acting inappropriately and hurtful because of that suffering. Try connecting with them, sharing that you’re having a hard time, asking for their support. This might not always turn out well, but they might be open to this discussion. 

 3. Find more positive friends.
 If all of this isn’t working, it helps to find other people who are living similarly to the way you want to live. People who are creative, entrepreneurial, self-sufficient, excited about things, positive, healthy, happy. Find a new bunch of friends in your local running club, yoga class or volunteer organizations.  Appreciate the relationships that have a positive influence in your life, and be a positive influence in theirs. I’ve done this in my life, and it’s made a huge difference.

4. Cut them out.
 It’s a hard thing to do, but when family members/friends/ partners aren’t supportive of me and they’re constantly critical and angry, and none of the above works, I will just stop seeing them as much. I’ll do my own thing and see other friends. It's harder to do when the toxic people live with you, but even then you can go out for a run, take a hike and see nature and meditate. Don’t let the thinking about toxic people be on your mind all day, put your mind in more peaceful and positive places.
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